101 College Quotes

101 Best Quotes from College Football

College football is one of the best places to start when looking for fun and interesting quotes. The sport is populated with names like Houston Nutt, Tubby Tuberville and Duffy Daugherty, so you know there are plenty of characters ready to fire off a memorable sound bite. In fact, I�ve assembled 101 of the best college football quotes for your enjoyment.

I was a little shocked to find Lou Holtz was so quotable. I swear; I’m not some closet Lou Holtz fan. He’s far down my list of favorite NCAA coaches, but that’s beside the point. Here’s the college quotes list.

College Football Quotes

  1. �When in doubt, punt!� (John Heisman)
  2. �He treats us like men. He lets us wear earrings.� (Torrin Polk on coach John Jenkins)
  3. �The Rose Bowl is the only bowl I�ve ever seen that I didn�t have to clean.� (Erma Bombeck)
  4. �Hawaii doesn�t win many games in the United States.� (Lee Corso)
  5. �When Clemson players rub that rock and run down the hill, it�s the most exciting 25 seconds in college football.� (Brent Musberger)
  6. �There are two things every man in America thinks he can do: work a grill and coach football.� (Greg Schiano)
  7. �The only bowl Rutgers is going to is the one I just got off of.� (Boston College QB Glenn Foley)
  8. �In life, as in a football game, the principle to follow is: Hit the line hard.� (President Theodore Roosevelt)
  9. �Gentlemen, it is better to have died as a small boy than to fumble this football.� (John Heisman)
  10. College Football Quotes - 101 College Football Quotes - NCAA Quotes �When I get the ball, for some reason I see holes. I�m not really sure how.� (Mike Bass of the University of Hawaii)
  11. �Is this college football�s version of Arena Football? These guys need to grow some hair on their peaches.� (Gary Danielson commenting on the Big East)
  12. �Don’t cuss. Don’t argue with the officials. And don’t lose the game.� (John Heisman)
  13. �College football is a sport that bears the same relation to education that bullfighting does to agriculture.� (Elbert Hubbard
  14. �At Georgia Southern, we don’t cheat. That costs money and we don’t have any.� (Erk Russell)
  15. �It would’ve been worth it if I hadn’t gotten caught.� (Rodney Landingham, University of Nevada defensive back, after being arrested for bank robbery)
  16. �You know what’s sad about this? Not the gambling, but the best way to reach college athletes is the Cartoon Network.� (Jay Leno, commenting on the NCAA plans to reach college athletes by launching an anti-gambling campaign on the Cartoon Network)
  17. �I’ve decided that if we play our very best and make no mistakes what-so-ever, we will definitely make a first down!� (John McKay)
  18. �If me and King Kong went into an alley, only one of us would come out. And it wouldn’t be the monkey.� (Lyle Alzado of Yankton College)
  19. �Treat a person as he is, and he will remain as he is. Treat him as what he could be, and he will become what he should be.� (Jimmy Johnson)
  20. �All those who need showers, take them.� (John McKay�s postgame message to his team following a 51-0 loss)
  21. �I haven�t heard from Elvis since his daughter married Michael Jackson. I think it killed him.� (Jerry Glanville)
  22. �We didn’t tackle well today, but we made up for it by not blocking.� (John McKay of USC)

ACC Quotes

  1. �Son, you�ve got a good engine, but your hands aren�t on the steering wheel.� (Bobby Bowden)
  2. �After you retire, there’s only one big event left….and I ain’t ready for that.� (Bobby Bowden of Florida State)
  3. �The rock has strange powers. When you rub it, and run down the hill, the adrenaline flows. It’s the most emotional experience I’ve ever had.� (Clemson alumni Michael Dean Perry)
  4. �I guess I’ll retire someday if I live that long.� (Bobby Bowden
  5. �That boy don�t know the meaning of the word fear. In fact, I just saw his grades, and that boy don�t know the meaning of a lot of words.� (Bobby Bowden)
  6. �I remember being nervous before the game because there were 80,000 people dressed in orange. Its intimidating. I even threw up before the game. Its the only time I’ve ever done that.� (Duke QB Dave Brown)

Big Ten Quotes

  1. �It’s not the size of the dog in the fight, but the size of the fight in the dog.� (Archie Griffen)
  2. �I’m really happy for Coach Cooper and the guys who’ve been around here for six or seven years, especially our seniors.� (Buckeyes QB Bob Hoying)
  3. �Physically, he’s a world-beater. Mentally, he’s an egg-beater.� (Matt Elliot describing Ohio State linebacker Alonzo Spellman
  4. �When I look in the mirror in the morning, I want to take a swing at me.� (Woody Hayes)
  5. �Hey, we’re like soldiers. Would you go to the Roman army and ask them if they thought they were going to win the battle? If I didn’t think we could win, I wouldn’t be here. I’d stay home and get fat.� (OSU tailback Ken Simonton)
  6. �We were sitting around figuring out how this team came together and we realized that we are a collection of southern California rejects and Oregon white trash.� (OSU quarterback Jonathan Smith)
  7. �I recruited a Czech kicker, and during the eye exam, when asked to read the bottom line, the kicker replied, �Read it? I know him.�� (Woody Hayes)
  8. �Football is not a contact sport-it is a collision sport. Dancing is a contact sport.� (Duffy Daugherty of Michigan State)
  9. �There’s nothing that cleanses your soul like getting the hell kicked out of you.� (Woody Hayes of Ohio State)
  10. �I could have been a Rhodes Scholar, except for my grades.� (Duffy Daugherty of Michigan State)
  11. �If lessons are learned in defeat, our team is getting a great education.� (Murray Warmath of Minnesota)
  12. �A tie is like kissing your sister.� (Duffy Daugherty)
  13. �And what team did you play for?� (Will Allen upon being introduced to Hall of Fame Steelers Lynn Swann)

SEC Quotes

  1. �If anything goes bad, I did it. If anything goes semi-good, we did it. If anything goes really good, then you did it. That’s all it takes to get people to win football games for you.� (Bear Bryant
  2. �Always remember….. Goliath was a 40 point favorite over David.� (Shug Jordan of Auburn)
  3. �My advice to defensive players: Take the shortest route to the ball and arrive in a bad humor.� (Bowden Wyatt of Tennessee)
  4. �I make my practices real hard because if a player is a quitter, I want him to quit in practice, not in a game.� (Bear Bryant)
  5. �If you want to walk the heavenly streets of gold, you gotta know the password, �Roll, tide, roll!�� (Bear Bryant)
  6. �When you win, nothing hurts.� (Joe Namath of Alabama)
  7. �I have yet to be in a game where luck was involved.� (Urban Meyer)
  8. �You can learn more character on the two-yard line than anywhere else in life.� (Paul Dietzel of LSU)
  9. �When people used to see Wake Forest on the schedule, they used a pen to mark down a `W.’ We’re at the point now where we at least make them use a pencil.� (Jim Grobe)
  10. �Motivation is simple. You eliminate those who are not motivated.� (Lou Holtz of Arkansas)
  11. �It’s kind of hard to rally around a math class.� (Bear Bryant
  12. �Here’s a twenty, bury two.� (Bear Bryant after being asked to contribute ten dollars to help bury a sportswriter)
  13. �But the real tragedy was that 15 hadn�t been colored yet.� (Steve Spurrier on a fire at Auburn�s football dorm which destroyed 20 books)
  14. �Whoa! I better lay off the peyote!� (Marcus Thomas after being informed of his first suspension)
  15. �I don�t hire anybody not brighter than I am. If they�re not brighter than I am, I don�t need them.� (Bear Bryant)
  16. �He’s a leading leader on this football team.� (Bill Curry)
  17. �An Atheist in Alabama is one that doesn�t believe in Bear Bryant.� (Wally Butts)

Big 12 Quotes

  1. �Football is only a game. Spiritual things are eternal. Nevertheless, Beat Texas.� (A church sign prior to the 1969 Texas/Arkansas game)
  2. �The secret to a happy life is to run out of cash and air at the same time.� (Bobby Layne)
  3. �They whipped us like a tied up goat.� (Spike Dykes of Texas Tech)
  4. �Oh, we played about like three tons of buzzard puke this afternoon.� (Spike Dykes of Texas Tech)
  5. �Three things can happen when you throw the ball, and two of them are bad.� (Darrell Royal)
  6. �They cut us up like boarding house pie. And that’s real small pieces.� (Darrell Royal)
  7. �I asked Darrell Royal, the coach of the Texas Longhorns, why he didn’t recruit me and he said: �Well, Walt, we took a look at you and you weren’t any good.�� (Walt Garrison of Oklahoma State)
  8. �We live one day at a time and scratch where it itches.� (Darrell Royal)
  9. �Take this, Pepe!� (Texas Tech coach Mike Leach recounting urinating on a neighborhood dog which tormented him as a child)
  10. �One player was lost because he broke his nose. How do you go about getting a nose in condition for football.� (Coach Darrell Royal on injuries resulting from poor physical conditioning)
  11. �It�s a good thing Brian was a 3rd child, or he would have been the only one.� (Kathy Bosworth)
  12. �Most players don�t mind drug testing once they realize they don�t have to study for it.� (Mack Brown)
  13. �I don’t expect to win enough games to be put on NCAA probation. I just want to win enough to warrant an investigation.� (Bob Devaney of Nebraska)
  14. �Dance with the one who brung ya.� (Darrell Royal)
  15. �You just scratch where it itches.� (Darrell Royal)
  16. �He�s as quick as a hiccup.� (Darrell Royal)
  17. �We�re as average as everyday�s wash.� (Darrell Royal)
  18. �On game day, I’m as nervous as a pig in a packing plant.� (Darrell Royal of Texas)

Notre Dame Quotes

  1. �There are two kinds of people in the world, Notre Dame lovers and Notre Dame haters. And, quite frankly, they�re both a pain in the ass.� (former Notre Dame coach Dan Devine)
  2. �A school without football is in danger of deteriorating into a medieval study hall.� (Frank Leahy)
  3. �At home we’re the hosts, and I never liked the idea of being embarrassed in front of our friends.� (Knute Rockne)
  4. �Yes, I know that you feel you are not strong enough. That’s what the enemy thinks, too. But we’re gonna fool them.� (Knute Rockne)
  5. �Lads, you’re not to miss practice unless your parents died or you died.� (Frank Leahy of Notre Dame)
  6. �I’ve found that prayers work best when you have big players.� (Knute Rockne of Notre Dame)
  7. �The only qualifications for a lineman are to be big and dumb. To be a back, you only have to be dumb.� (Knute Rockne)
  8. �Let’s win one for the Gipper.� (Knute Rockne)
  9. �It isn�t necessary to see a good tackle. You can hear it.� (Knute Rockne)
  10. �One man practicing sportsmanship is better than a hundred teaching it.� (Knute Rockne)

Lou Holtz Quotes

  1. �You’ll never get ahead of anyone as long as you try to get even with him� (Lou Holtz)
  2. �If he’s got golf clubs in his truck or a camper in his driveway, I don’t hire him.� (Lou Holtz)
  3. �A lifetime contract for a coach means if you’re ahead in the third quarter and moving the ball, they can’t fire you.� (Lou Holtz)
  4. �No one has ever drowned in sweat.� (Lou Holtz)
  5. �On this team, we�re all united in a common goal: to keep my job.� (Lou Holtz)
  6. �When all is said and done, more is said than done.� (Lou Holtz)
  7. �No, but you can see it from here.� (Lou Holtz when asked if Fayetteville was at the end of the world)
  8. �If you don’t make a total commitment to whatever you’re doing, then you start looking to bail out the first time the boat starts leaking. It’s tough enough getting that boat to shore with everybody rowing, let alone when a guy stands up and starts putting his jacket on.� (Lou Holtz)
  9. �Broadcasting is easy; you just talk until you think of something to say.� (Lou Holtz)
  10. �I never learn anything talking. I only learn things when I ask questions.� (Lou Holtz)
  11. �If what you did yesterday seems big, you haven’t done anything today.� (Lou Holtz)
  12. �If you burn your neighbor�s house down, it doesn�t make your house look any better.� (Lou Holtz)
  13. �The man who complains about the way the ball bounces is most likely the one who dropped it.� (Lou Holtz)
  14. �Absolutely. There are a 1000 better coaches in the cities, but I�m the best in the country.� (Lou Holtz, when asked if he was the best coach in the country)
  15. �To my wife�I told you I was sick.� (Lou Holtz, when asked what he would want carved on his tombstone)

Auburn vs. Villanova, 1942
Auburn vs. Villanova, 1942 Giclee Print
Buy at AllPosters.com

More Football Reading